We recently had Rebecca Dollard, The Motherhood Mentor, as a guest speaker at our Northern Colorado business mastermind, The Mina Collective. She blew our minds talking about all things perfectionism, boundaries, and how to make them WORK for you.
Perfectionism is like driving a car that you can’t trust the brakes or the gas. It is an INTERNALIZED shaming witness and critic. It destroys self-trust, safety, and peace when used in a harmful way.
Most of us learned to HEAVILY rely on outside leadership to tell us what to do and not do. It’s not just external validation; it’s external permission and shame when we didn’t get it just right. A BIG part of healing the relationship with ourselves is learning to find INTERNAL permission, validation, and leadership – and know when and who has the power and influence
When we trust our boundaries, our “yes” comes from overflow and not resentment. Our perfectionism can be gas to drive our ambition and desires and impact when we trust that our “yes” is true and in integrity – we get to trust our ambition and enjoy the payout.
When we live in self-leadership, self-authority, and sovereignty, we trust our lives and ourselves to navigate what life throws at us. We stay grounded and unshakable when “balance” is laughable. We don’t need the road or conditions to be perfect to stay in our values and direction.
What would it look like to heal the relationship to you?
When it comes to perfectionism, don’t let the glimmers become the guilt. Let your guilt become glimmers of the direction of your desires and values. This is part of you so that it can create goodness for you and others. You can learn to trust this part of you. Create boundaries so that your ambition and desire to heal and improve can be a gift and not a punishment you carry.
Listen in for tips and words of inspiration to overcome the burden of perfectionism and set boundaries that help you fully live!